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How to be a Reformed Shopaholic

*published on Mod Magazine Nov 2010

1. Leave the cards. If you are prone to overspending, it may be good idea to leave your credit card -or even debit card- in the house. Easy access to cash or credit makes you more prone to overspending.

2. Plan your purchases. Make a list of items you’d like to buy before heading off to the mall. Write an amount you plan to spend on each item. Stick to your list.

3. Ask yourself, do I really need this now? When you see something you like, ask yourself why you’d like to buy it. Do you really need it now? Or it’s just the pleasure of buying that you’re after? Leave the item behind and go back for it after awhile while you think it over. Sometimes, you can think clearly when the object of your desire is not in front of you. You may even try sleeping over it.

4. Be critical. Think of reasons why you shouldn’t buy the item. Look for damage or defect on the item. Convince yourself it’s not a good buy.

5. Bring a buddy along when shopping. Somebody who’s supposed to reason with you, whose role is to be kontrabida and discourage you from too much shopping.

6. Keep track of your daily spending. Review regularly. In hindsight, you will see how much you could have saved if it weren’t for compulsive buying.

7. Stay away from the malls. Think of other real productive activities like gardening, playing the piano, painting, writing letters or emails & bonding moments with family and friends like baking, swimming, going to mass, watching a DVD at home. There’s a whole lot of other things you can do. Make a list now.

8. Be firm with yourself. Treat yourself like a little kid. Reason with yourself but be patient also and learn to celebrate small successes.

Confessions of a Reformed Shopaholic

published on Mod Magazine Nov 2010 issue

What better time to shop than this holiday season! At this time of the year, we, Shopaholics are given justification to shop till we drop! We need not feel guilty because this is after all the time for giving or in our case, should I say giving in to our vice?

I think Shopaholics should create a group in the Philippines. I’m sure a lot of Filipinas would join the group if only to wear the membership pin as a badge of honor.

Admit it, shopping, although apparently is not only confined to the rich and affluent, is something that we’re proud of as our form of recreation, or therapy. Because if we like shopping, it means we can afford luxury and time as well. It simply means we’ve got money to burn.

But even if we choose to be hypocrites about it, it’s undeniable that a lot of us love the excitement of going to the mall, the rush of seeing the SALE sign, the joy of finding the one or one hundred items we’ve been dreaming about, the pleasure of making that purchase, and the delight of paying through our credit or debit cards.

I, for one , can easily list down 10 persons I know, without thinking hard, who shop excessively. Yes, I’m surrounded and so I’m not surprised, I am what I am. Other than the people around me, I also blame the media, the ad people, the malls, my job, my industry. I belong to the fashion retail industry. I am paid to go to the mall and see what’s new, what’s selling, including buying samples, and often times I end up buying for myself.

OK, enough of the blaming. We are our own after all. We make our own choices. In my case, in every trip I make to the mall or tiangge, I choose to be productive, and that is to make a purchase. If I come out of the mall not buying anything, something must be wrong. The itch has to be scratched. Therefore, I’d make sure my friend or whoever is with me should buy something -- then I’m happy.

Here are the signs that you are addicted to shopping:

• Buying one style of an item in different colors. I’d have two to three colors of the same style of pants or blouse or dress especially when on sale. My credo: if you can’t choose among the available colors, don’t just get one, get two, a few, several or all. One time I loved this pair of linen pants so much, I got two pairs of the same color of the very same style!

• Owning a collection of one item more than an average person would have. My friend, Rissa*, is the first to come to mind. She owns 50 pairs of two-piece bathing suits and 10 one-pieces. She can go on two months on the beach without wearing the same pair. When we’d go to the beach for a three to four-day vacay, she’d change two times a day. It’s like having a fashion photo shoot every day.

• Starving yourself in favor of shopping. My shopping friend Jackie* and I were in Bangkok one time when we realized the next day, after a night of carefree shopping spree that we were out of cash. We didn’t have enough cab fare to the airport! Our solution: we skipped lunch since our flight was 1:30pm and they serve rice meals anyway. We had a late breakfast and we ate a lot since it was buffet. Unfortunately, the flight was delayed and when we were finally up in the air and when the flight stewards were about to serve food, there was air turbulence so they had to hold lunch for some time. We had lunch at 4 p.m. You think we’d learned our lesson? Even if I knew we’d have to skip lunch the next day, I still would’ve chosen to buy the embroidered white blouse with puffed sleeves. Same for Jackie who said, it’s okay for her to starve for as long as she has a new pretty skirt.

• Buying stuff you don’t use just because they’re on sale or they come with a freebie. Another friend, Monet*, knows and goes to every sale in the city. If I want to know where she is, all I have to do is check out which mall is on sale. Chances are she’s there, going there or came from there already, with her unwilling accomplice, her husband. Since I am in the retail business, I should be filling her in as to when and where the mall sales are, but for some reason, she always finds out before I even text her. She can smell it, I suppose.

Now, when I’d visit her, she’d show me her bargain hunts. Some would be something she didn’t even need but because it was offered half off or comes with a free bag or discount card, she bought. Her reason, one day, she’ll find something to use it for. She likes to say, you’ll never know when you’ll need one so better be ready.

• Feeling a pump of adrenalin when shopping that you don’t feel tired or hungry until you’ve bought all you want for the day. Sometimes I amaze myself at how much energy I have during shopping time considering I came from work during the day. Though I easily get hungry, I don’t when it’s the holy hour of shopping.

• Keeping stuff in your closet you haven’t used and worse, some with the tags still on. If it weren’t for Typhoon Ondoy, Rissa would have completely forgotten a luggage-full of clothes not worn yet and some with tags on. She is like Monet who buys say, a dress on sale thinking she’ll soon have a party or occasion to wear it to. Besides, why think twice when it’s on 70% off, is her reasoning.

• Maxing out your credit card. I maxed out three of my credit cards at one time. Slowly, I had them all cut off and paid them all off. I swore off credit cards. One day, I was offered a credit card with waived annual fee on the first year and freebie items. I said, why not. Before long, I had three again. When I found myself charging in dollars when I’m out of the country, I said enough of this already. Before, I swim in debt again, I had the two cut off which I maxed out and paid them off completely. I kept one for convenience purposes especially when on trips and for online transactions also like airline booking. I made myself a rule: I will only use it when I already have the money to pay for it.

• Coming up with justification for your purchases. I have a friend, Jon*, who likes giving himself expensive gifts on special occasions. I thought, what a bright idea! It’s all about appreciating and loving yourself. But I realized it was actually just made up to rationalize his overspending. Why do I say overspending? His idea of special occasions are his birthday, of course, Christmas, and holidays like Labor Day, Rizal Day… get the drift? By early May, he has bought himself his Christmas gift to myself.

Yes, I may be guilty of this addiction to shopping and overspending. But that’s a thing of the past, or so I think. I keep telling myself, I am now a reformed shopping addict, hoping it becomes a reality. I did have a relapse some two weeks back where I splurged on some shoes and bags. There was a sale on shoes and bags andI really needed new pairs of shoes. Though I got a little carried away, I had some restraint. Given the techniques I’ve learned to curb my appetite for shopping, I was able to trim it down to a pair of shoes (I was initially eyeing three pairs) and 2 pieces of bags and some little stuff like a pair of headbands, purple soft-bristled hairbrush, 3-three pack s of socks, five pieces of underwear and a pink purse. To lessen the guilt, I bought my mom, a pack of socks and my sister two pieces of undies. Anyway, I still consider it a success, though small because at least I paid with my debit card which is as good as cash. I really considered all my purchases long and hard.

With the holidays coming, I think I will have to drill my mantra many more times so I may truly say, I am a Shopaholic no more and give up my Shopaholic Philippines pin with pride. Wish me luck.

*Not their real names

hot forever 21 fever

i've been hearing from friends in the fashion industry about the invasion of the real forever 21 to manila & finally last fri, it has landed. i planned to go on its opening day to make ush-show-sow. (alright to be honest, i wanted to get a gc, as i read from chuvaness that they're giving away such for early birds. i love freebies!)

for some reason, i forgot about it & good thing i did cos my good friend jinj told me the place was packed. there was no way, i could've gotten a free voucher she said. & peeps were shopping like there's no tomorrow. everybody stylish & nagpapanggap na stylish were there. designers & merchandisers including their mm's & probably even their vp's opted to go on field that day & do competitive check. read: shopping ;p

so i said, curious me will go when the curiosity is over. so tonight, since i was around mega, i thought it's been a week & it's a thu so maybe there won't be too many peeps & i was wrong. they had like 10 or 12 counters & yet the queues are sooo loooong. henry sy's magic in the works again ;p

dreamy-eyed women & gays (probably envisioning how to wear their new outfits the next couple of days) & not-so-happy men (probably fielded in by girlfriends/wives to line up for them while they're in the dressing room or checking out the fancy accs.) were braving the loooonng lines with, i would say, 4 items ave. per customer. mr. sy must be very happy. hurray!

i'm happy for sm. i heard they were eagerly anticpating to bring in h&m about 3 years ago. (hence, the specualted reason behind facelift of sm mkti & sm dept stores.) at around the same time, rustan's peeps were saying, they will bring in h&m. why it didn't come to pass, dunno.

i'm happy for the fashionistas on a budget & me-self. they don't have to contend with vintage (read: uks) products. not a fan. alright, i did buy a few items but eventually stopped. i didn't like boiling clothes.

i wonder how this will affect brands like mango, zara & even local brands. f21 has very affordable items. the night before f21's opening, i happened to take a sneak peak at zara sale at gb & as usual, ladies & gents were grabbing items like mad. i wonder if it's still the same story the day f21 opened its doors. are they hurt by the new kid in town? i wonder what happened to old (fake daw) f21 here in manila before.

worth noting are the trendy & pretty shoppers in the "candy store" for fashionistas. those that i only used to see at shang are here. sm seems to be attracting more upper class clientele. they started with m&s, then the block, mega atrium, to which i have to ask, is it working? are the tenants making money? doesn't look like it. except forthis latest venture. let's see if it holds.

while i was doing all these wondering & scanning the huge & expansive fashion store, to be efficient, i was also picking up a striped knitchambray combi mini-dress, cute bandeau, jersey shortalls, plain v-neck tee, true blue jeans, silver loop earrings to try on & welcome to my wardrobe. but i wasn't brave enough to wait in line for the dressing room so i said i can't go wrong with my choices. & given the inexpensive prices, it won't hurt if later, i change my mind. like i don't like the fit or it doesn't look good on me. besides, i can always wrap it for christmas gift to friends (oops, there goes my secret.). it's fast approaching anyway. by now, some brands are already brainstorming for their concept for christmas. they might also want to start plotting how to conquer or tame this latest entry to the roster of fashion brands.

so, i told me-curious self, i'm going to buy these stuff right away, no need to fit. i showed my true color & my real nature came out of its shell, shopaholic sachi emerged. i have to buy these now! i have to get my shopping fix now! i've tried it on the mirror, i justified. but then, i look at the box office hit line, & i say, forget it, i'm hungry. it's a little past dinnertime.

what??!!! me, getting hungry while shopping? i can't believe it! in my whole shopping life, this is a first! i don't get tired or hungry when shopping. i've shopped long & wide, sometimes even in heels, sometimes with a slight fever & flu, during sale in metro manila malls, in flea markets, in hk, in bkk. i don't get tired because i'm in my element. up until tonight.

what happened to me? this is so not me. i have changed! i'm free, i'm liberated from the shackles of commercialism & instant gratification. i'm no longer a shopaholic! i'm released of my vice... should i be scared? ;p

anyway, i left the store without any goodie (sorry to the sy's, i'm not parting with my moolah tonight. so what, for definitely sure, they're not the slightest bit affected.) but i didn't feel that bad. huh? i don't know me anymore. i've matured ;p but i swear, i'll be back, better prepared. i'll go when the office folks are still trapped in their cubicles so i'll have a grand time hehe.

f21, i'll be back with a vengeance & shop like crazy. friends, let's sugod! ;p